How Not To Get Laid In Antigua

Te ves hermoso she whispered into my ear. Gracias, I replied, trying to keep calm and cool.

Olivia was a gorgeous Latina who I had just met, she and her friends were celebrating the long weekend in Antigua. They lived in Guatemala City and Antigua is just a short drive away.

Antigua Guatemala

Antigua Guatemala via Flickr / pedrosz

Antigua is a charming old city surrounded by volcanoes which receives more than fifty percent of all the tourists who visit Guatemala. And this is not without merit. Apart from the beautiful scenery and amazing Spanish colonial-era architecture, the night life is banging. This also calls the rich socialites from Guatemala City, on the weekends you can see university kids spending their parent’s cash without regret.

What was I doing in Antigua, Guatemala?

At that moment I was backpacking the Guatemalan Highlands with a good friend and since it was his birthday, we agreed to forget about our budgets and have some fun. I always tend to let loose whenever celebrating a friend’s big day, even more so than when it’s my own birthday.

We decided to go bar hopping. First we hit an American style bar and second we found a Salsa club, the vibe was better so we stayed. The place was filled with people dancing, drinking and being merry. We had found what we were looking for.

Olivia was there, she made it a point to be seen and it wasn’t hard to notice her. Her smile, her laughter, her glow; such a fine specimen of a woman. Coincidentally, I had already unofficially met her. I had run into her when walking the streets of Antigua and she had flirtatiously said hello as she flew pass me.

After settling down at the bar for a while, Olivia walked towards where I was and stood next to me to order a drink.

She looked at me and smiled. I had to say something. I blurted out: “Hey, how’s it going?” Hablas Espanol? She replied. Ah good, I said to myself and continued to woo her in Spanish.

Party scene in Guatemala

Party scene via Flickr / hamzadaoui

She was game I told myself. That’s how you do it in Guatemala, gentlemen.

Actually, it did not end up as I thought it would.

For more than an hour, Olivia and I had a great time together, until she asked me where I was from. And when she heard Belize, our short romance ended abruptly. She made an excuse that her friends where worrying about her and left. Yes, just like that.

What the heck happened there?

The root of the issue starts from the fact that Guatemala and many other developing countries have massive inequality problems. But in Guatemala it’s a little worst, you’re either rich or poor. Middle-class is practically nonexistent. Olivia came from money and similar to many other well off women in Guatemala, if you’re not from the same social class, you don’t fit the bill. And unfortunately I came from “small and poor Belize.”

The point of this story isn’t to whine about me not finding romance in Antigua. The title (How not to get laid in Antigua) was more of a way to catch your attention and share with you an important lesson I learnt while traveling. Discrimination has many shapes and forms and can be witnessed in various ways. Being rejected by a girl because she thought I wasn’t good enough for her is one of many. I travel to learn, I travel to become a student of the world.

In your travels, have you ever encounter or heard about something similar? Do share your experience below.

About Lorenzo Gonzalez

Lorenzo Gonzalez is the founder of, a resource for travel information on Belize. He enjoys traveling, social media and Paranda music. Contact him at lorenzo [at] Learn more...

10 Responses to How Not To Get Laid In Antigua

  1. Clive Myers August 7, 2012 at 6:10 PM #

    Nice article 🙂

  2. jouljet September 21, 2012 at 1:03 AM #

    Oh, shame. She was clearly not worthy of you mate!
    That photo if Antigua at the top makes me want to visit – so pretty!

  3. cayoMAN October 18, 2012 at 4:09 PM #

    lol u get drop chief. best advice just stand up dust off and keep on trucking. lol good one bro.

  4. Cristina December 20, 2012 at 2:44 PM #

    Oh no! Lorenzo, you’re definitely too good for her!


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